~Ephesians 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
You may not realize this right now, but developing your relationship with your mother could be the best thing that you ever do for yourself! Your mother is going to be your best friend within the next 10-15 years. If that sounds like an impossibility right now, I have just the right answers for you 🙂
Sadly, we usually can’t change other people – we can’t change the way they think or the way they act. What we can have control over is us! I was not saved when I was a teenager, but was saved in my mid 20’s. As I looked back at my relationship with my mother, I discovered that problems existed because of me! I was immature and was not aware of the Scriptures and how I should act.
The Scriptures teach us that we should honor our parents. So let’s start there. Whether your mother is saved or not, it is instructed to you to honor her. The word honor means:
A testimony of esteem; any expression of respect or of high estimation by words or actions;
We women are emotional creatures, as I’m sure you well know 🙂 Learning to control our emotions is an on-going process and it needs to start early. How many times have you seen a child throw a temper tantrum? It’s not a pretty sight at all. If it is left uncorrected, that child grows up into a monster of a teenager who is self-centered and everything about life revolves around her. 😦 If you hate your mother, is it because she has disciplined you in this area? Is your mother trying to train you to become a responsible adult? She is trying to prepare you for the future and to teach you that life is not all about you! People do not owe you anything. In fact, as a saved teenager, you owe the Lord God everything. He died and paid the price for your sins so you can go to Heaven. Your life should be centered around Him, not yourself. 😉
As I said earlier, you can’t change your Mom but you can change yourself. Read your Bible and see what God has to say about girls learning from their mothers. If you have a mother who isn’t saved and she doesn’t care about nurturing her relationship with you, then YOU need to nurture your relationship with her! Honor her whether she deserves it or not. Esteem her because of her position as your mother. Because your mother is an emotional creature like you, this kind of treatment will speak to her heart. Be genuine and don’t treat her nicely only because you want something from her. Treat her nicely and love her because it is what God commands. Do things for her as though you were doing it for the Lord. Christ’s love within us comes shining through when we are doing things for other people. That’s what is considered genuine 🙂
~Philippians 2:3-4 [Let] nothing [be done] through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. 4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.
As your mother sees your genuineness and sweet spirit, she will respond with the same attitude toward you. Developing this relationship is so vital. Your Mom has so much she could teach you if you would give her a chance. Have some Mom time – go on “Mom/daughter dates” and ask questions about her childhood. If you are blessed to have a Godly Christian mother, have her teach you the necessities of becoming a Proverbs 31 woman 🙂 Maybe your mother didn’t have a saved mother and no one taught her. This provides an excellent opportunity for the two of you to have a Bible study on this very topic 🙂
The bottom line is to nurture your relationship with your mother NOW. By the time you’re in your mid to late 20’s, you will look to your Mother a whole more than you will to your friends for answers to life’s situations. 🙂